I don’t know about you, but I do sports regularly, eat healthy and make sure I rest well.
But it wasn’t until a couple of years back that I realized that I was forgetting something….
And I think most of us are in the same place.
We do sports to keep our body in good shape, we go on holidays to spend quality time with the family, we take vitamins to support our immune system. Maybe you even do your calls standing up these days, since you heard “sitting is the new smoking”?
So, would you consider yourself to be fit?
Whether yes or no, let me ask you another question: what efforts do you make to ensure the fitness of your magnificent brain? Most of us treat our laptop better than the wiring of our internal computer: virus protection, defragmenting, removing the cookies,…
Scientists now tell us that mental aspects heavily influence all kinds of (auto-immune) diseases, with a positive mindset having a tremendous impact on recovery.
Mental fitness matters greatly, so why don’t we initiate regular upgrades?
How much better would your life be with a brain wash – clean out the cob webs?
Take the edge off. Stop the tiring energy drains. Work more freely and easily with your co-workers. Alleviate strong memories that only cause recurring tension between you and your spouse. Lift the anchors and get more excited about challenging targets. Reach them halfway the year instead of scrambling at the end. And why not: have your bonus increase accordingly?
How does one achieve “the Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind”?
I’ll tell you about my experience. You don’t have to do the same, just consider this.
In the economic downturn of the early 80’s, my teenage years were less than spotless. My father’s business went bankrupt due to bad business partners and a worse economy (or vice versa), and he spiraled down, lifting depression with alcohol. My mother, responsible for the maintenance of 4 children and a spouse, didn’t have much energy left when she came home.
I got to stand on my own two feet fast and early. I made sure to keep my distance, never ask for help, shun intimacy lest I would embarrass us all by exposing the family secret.
That was the unconscious bit – the conscious teenage me suffered most from walking around in my older cousin’s out-of-fashion clothes (yes, really, even with 80’s fashion! :-)) and torn trainers.
Since challenges bring wisdom, in the end I came to realize that intimacy is good, rather than something to avoid and I reinvented myself clearing all the limiting ideas from my brain. With what I know now, about communication, better cooperation, how to lessen frustration and stress, my earlier working days would have been smoother, promotions might have been quicker.
This is not me crying over spilt milk – thanks to my overarching goal to become independent my career definitely meets the standard definition of success. It JUST could have been SOOO MUCH EASIER … which is why I am sharing this: I would love people to realize that it can be easy. It does not need to be hard. Really. Promise.
Today, I defragment my mind regularly.
I’m simply happy and in charge of my own thoughts and emotions.
People tell me I look better, more relaxed: the inside work showing on the outside.
So, how can knowing this help YOU?
Your intention and attention forms a positive or negative energy, which is immediately picked up by others. Remember that speaker who was just not getting the message across? Their stage presence not authentic, incongruent, their posture and energy level not in line with their words?
You do the same. If your brain is engaged in other stuff, if your thoughts are not aligned with your actions on a real level, it stops you from winning, and thus from hitting your targets. At home. At work.
There are good practices for a “Spotless Mind”. No, I am not talking about erasing your memories like in the movie. Just that you don’t have to drag the emotional anchors of your past. You will speed ahead like lightning once you’re running a virus protection regularly to remove the inevitable corruptions that life brings.
These practices are easy to do and only take a couple of minutes – play with them to see which one works best for you.
1. Integrating your subs
You know these moments when you’re arguing with yourself? One part of you wants to eat the cookie, another part of you is telling you off since you just decided on a sugar-free day? Annoying, draining your willpower. The weird thing is, if you’d really let the two voices in your head talk about their intentions, you’ll find that both subparts want the same thing for you: give you a good life. Take some time with yourself to conclude such internal conversations, ask yourself what’s the purpose behind the superficial yes/no discussion and you’ll be amazed.
2. Focus on the positive
Set your intentions with positive goals only.
I’m sure you’ve heard it said before, but let me give you some examples.
It means replacing ”I don’t want to be overweight anymore” with “I am ready to be thin”.
“I don’t want to feel this stressed, I can’t take it anymore” will become “I’ll feel relaxed today, tomorrow, and the day after”.
Instead of “I have to stop drinking this much”, think “I am happy with one drink”.
Visualize yourself, hear yourself, feel yourself as you’re reaching your positive goals, every day for 20 days, and find yourself a changed person.
3. Your little masochist
Change the words you use in your thoughts and conversations.
Replace sentences with “I have to …”, “I should…”, “I must…” with three different sentences: “I will…”, then “I can…”, then “I want to…”.
What impact does each rephrased sentence have on you?
4. The critical voice
That voice that’s calling you names when you forgot something. That talks to you about what you should have done, could have done. The one that’s presenting you feedback on failures like running a slow-motion rewind of a missed goal in a soccer game.
You know it? Useless, right?
Going over the past as if that’ll change the outcome of that game.
Now hear that voice and notice where it comes from. Left ear, right ear, somewhere above your head, behind you? What tone of voice is it speaking in? Once you’ve registered this, replace the words consciously with positive phrases, same location, same tone, same volume. Use sentences like “you are doing great”, “you’re an inspiration to your team / your children”, “I’m impressed with you” until you realize that it’s impossible for the old critical voice to come back without you laughing at it’s words.
There is more where thIS came from
These are some examples of tools to upgrade your mental capacities, clean out negativity and gain GB’s of energy for other things – maintain your brain.
You can find these and more complex ones on the net, if you look for NLP, that is, neuro-linguistic programming, if you like to do more self-help.
However, you’re very welcome to drop me a note or a call for us to work together on a concrete toolkit tailored to you and your circumstances. Or you can subscribe to my newsletter for regular updates and some great discounts.